Naughty List

It's 4:20 a.m on Christmas morning and my computer thinks it's 9:19pm. I'm stuck in a time warp. And what the heck am I doing awake at this hour? I'm up with the worst back spasms I've ever had in my life. For real. As in take your breath away bad. Cry like a baby bad. An unfortunate side affect of forgetting I was 57 and thinking I could hoist the world's largest/heaviest box into a shopping cart at the UPS store.

So this year Christmas is made possible by the generous contributions of the makers of Purity Eggnog, Maker's Mark, Advil and Flexeril (but not all at once, mind you).

Funny, I didn't even know I was on the naughty list...

It's Christmas Eve! Go BIG or Go Home...

Ok, I'll admit it, when I entertain my biggest fear is that we'll run out of food before the party's over. I'm like that. I can't help it. So of course when it comes time for folks to leave, you can bet I'm in the kitchen trying to foist leftovers on anyone with one hand free.

I also worry that the food I cook won't have enough flavor. So in honor of the holidays (the perfect excuse to eat and drink in excess after all), I give you our Christmas Eve tradition. Yes folks, it's time for Deb's Go BIG or Go HOME Spinach Lasagne recipe. It's big on flavor, big on calories and it's labor intensive, BUT it's worth it!

What you'll need

• 2 Boxes Lasagne Noodles (We're gluten free in our house so I use Pasta Joy)
• 2 cans of fire roasted tomatoes
• 1 can Hunt's Four-Cheese Spaghetti Sauce
• 1 tsp oregano
• 1 tbs sugar
• 4 tbs butter
• 4 tbs olive oil
• One large onion chopped
• 2 lbs of Italian sausage (patties or removed from casings)
• 1 lb of ricotta
• 2 eggs
• Big handful of parsley, finely chopped
• 5 cloves of garlic, minced
• 3 scallions, minced
• 2 small bags of frozen spinach
• 1 cup heavy cream
• ½ cup grated pizza cheese
• ½ cup grated pepper jack cheese
• 2 cups grated mozzarella cheese

Get out your large, DEEP lasagne pan. Don't use that skimpy 9 x 12” baking pan you use for brownies. It won't be deep enough. Buy one of those disposable aluminum lasagne pans they sell in Wegmans or if you're really feeling like a splurge, go order yourself one of these.

Open all three cans of sauce and dump 'em in a dutch oven along with the oregano and the sugar. Cover and turn the flame on medium.

Sauté the minced garlic and scallions 'til softened in 2 tbs butter and 2 tbs olive oil. Place on a small plate to cool.

Saute chopped onion in the rest of the butter and olive oil 'til it's transluscent. Add the italian sausage and cook through. When it's done, place it in small batches in the food processor and pulse 'til the texture is more fine. Add to the sauce and continue cooking on low.

Place both bags of frozen spinach into a large skillet with about a cup or a cup and a half of water and a little salt. Cook 'til the water is almost gone. Add a heaping tablespoon of the garlic/scallion mixture and the heavy cream. Cook 'til the cream reduces a bit and starts to thicken up, then process the heck out of it with an immersion blender 'til it looks a little like baby food. Trust me on this. Stir in the grated cheese. Add salt and pepper to taste. Set aside in a large bowl to cool. Try not to eat it all yourself.

After you've cleaned the food processor bowl, process the ricotta, eggs, the rest of the garlic/scallions, the chopped parsley. Add a good helping of salt and pepper. Taste it for seasoning after it's blended. Yes, I know it has raw eggs in it. Just taste it already. It won't kill you. You must be sure it has enough salt and pepper. Set aside.

Time to layer! Layer of sauce, layer of noodles, layer of ricotta (and by ricotta I mean ALL the ricotta), layer of sauce and mozzerella, more noodles, layer of creamed spinach (yes, ALL of it), more noodles, layer of sauce. You should be up to the top of the pan or out of noodles by now. Add more sauce to fill in around the edges. Cover with foil and bake immediately or stash it in the frig 'til later. Bake for 30-40 minutes. Remove foil, load up the top with more cheese and bake 'til browned and bubbly. Let it sit for a bit so it comes out looking like this:

 Oh don't I wish!! Who's lasagne ever comes out of the pan looking all neat and fresh like this?

This year I doing something I was taught never to do. I'm experimenting on our unsuspecting guests and trying something brand new – NOT cooking the noodles before I layer them in the pan. I read about it on the internet so it must be true, right?

Merry Christmas everyone! Now, eat up while it's hot!

UPDATE! The no-bake method worked like a charm. I will never boil lasagne noodles again!!

Christmas Miracles

We're having a wet, warm and somewhat wacky Christmas this year. I'd rather have white, but there's not a thing in the world I can do about it.

K is off for TWO solid weeks and the world's largest game of catch-up has begun. Upstairs and down, inside and out, you name it and we're messin' with it.

And ever the optimist, I've not given up hope for the most elusive of all Christmas miracles...getting the cars in the garage. 

Hey, a girl can dream, can't she?

Welcome Yule

It is Solstice eve and man is is ever dark. We've been feeling the weight of winter. That inexplicable heaviness, grumpy for no reason, slow, tired and fuzzy time of year.

Here's to new beginnings, big dreams and bringing back the light.  It is a time of great promise and joy!

Help Wanted

Slowing moving gray day

One more cup of coffee please

I need help today

Getting Real

Some habits die hard and so for me is the habit of creating a to-do list that is way longer than any human being can accomplish in a week, let alone 24 hours. 

As I was madly running around yesterday, feeling the insane pressure of an over-scheduled day, it suddenly occurred to me that I had a choice. That no dean, committee or needy student was nipping at my heels to get things done, there was no time clock running and the semester was not about to end. Yet, that's exactly how I was operating. I'd put it on the list and dammit, I was going to do it. How utterly ridiculous. 

So I ditched the last activity on the list, stayed home and dealt with the stuff that had piled up and was making me crazy, and cleared the clutter. House cleared. Mind cleared. Stress gone. 

I aim to stop the glorification of busy. I really do. But this old habit is a deeply entrenched one and if I'm honest, it's rooted deeply in control. If I don't do it know one will. If I don't do it, it won't get done right. IF. IF. IF. There's that damn IF word again. 

As my friend Carrie once said, the "the to-do list is a trick of the ego designed to give me a set of problems that seem like only I can solve".  

So I'm ditching the old list in favor of the real one and making room. Not just for the good things, but for the GREAT ones.

Stormin'

A slow moving storm is ambling over our area today and will keep us company for the day. 

Glad I've got lots of indoor work to do,

 and a trusty assistant.

Our long gone, ancient maple continues to supply us with ample wood for the fire. I'll make soup from the frozen Thanksgiving turkey carcass and get the oven going with an egg casserole. Anything to keep our drafty old kitchen warm!

Curling up with a good book, a kitten or two and a huge mug of coffee is awfully tempting today, 
but there is a ton of stuff to do today.

Happy, cozy, peaceful, productive winter day.

Eff

In honor of my dear friend Kathy who braved cancer not once but FOUR times, I vow to live life through a filter of greater optimism, gratitude and grace. I vow to lighten up already and when occasion calls for it, not shrink from using a well placed "F" bomb. I know Kathy would approve.

K and I are prone to researching 'til we're blue in the face. It's time now for us to take some risks. Time to move outside our comfort zones and into the realm of possibility. Even a squeak outside the comfort zone would do. It's time to stop wondering what if and make a move, make a decision, and act on all that research. 

It's time to...

Let's FLY!

OK, here we go!

Soon

Dreams are spinning, ideas are flowing and plans are being made. It's especially wonderful to have a big project up and running in the dark time of the year. And even more wonderful to watch it all come into focus. Soon it will be Solstice.

 Build up the bonfires, now the seasons turn
Welcome in another year and let the old one burn

Here come your sorrows, all your old regrets
every broken promise and every unpaid debt

Light the bonfires, another year has flown
Gather friends around you don’t spend the night alone

Perched on your shoulder yearning toward the flame
Pour them a glass of whiskey and greet them all by name
 
Sweep out the courtyard to greet the coming year
Lay a handsome table, your visitors are here

Build up the bonfires now the seasons turn
Welcome in another year and let the old one burn

(with thanks to Zoe Mulford)

Choosing

Choosing the high road. I know it's right. I know it brings good karma. I know it's better for my overall health and well-being. 

But sometimes it's hard and often it just sucks.

Mindfulness. 

The gift that keeps on giving and the only way to  keep the negative thoughts from intruding and taking over the script.